Post by Michael on Oct 1, 2009 18:14:25 GMT -5
This is not my best of ideas, so I figured I'd get a little critique before starting it up. Please let me know what you think.
P.S. It is kind of long, even though I omitted everything unimportant.
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Rise of the Machine
Phoenix, Arizona
Two months ago, Christian Miller woke up in the ER of a hospital, following a violent car crash. He was badly injured, even though he could swear he only had one drink, and there had been something on the road… He was bound for jail for DUI and Destruction of Public Property unless he agreed to some serious community service.
Drafted into service work in the hospital, he notices a patient wheeled in that won't stop screaming. As he watches, the Blood Pressure continues to rise. The patient dies in one last faint scream. Then the ER gets strangely...silent.
Minutes later, a small metal tumor rises out of the patients temple. The heart rate monitor then says the patient is alive again, and everything is fine. A nurse leans over to listen for breath. Almost instantly, the patient leaps up and bites off her ear. Tearing out the straps that were placed in before he died, and chases the fleeing doctors. A lot of the other nearby patients do the same. And parts of them seem...almost metallic.
Barely escaping with their lives, Christian and several others hide out in the cellar of a restaurant called The Dinner Lobby. With him are the two others from the car accident, Jonathan and Amanda; Nancy, an ER nurse with recurring panic attacks; and Rick, a hospital security guard who doesn't know what happened to his wife.
Later on, they are forced out of their hiding place. What they find above is simply deserted. Rubble, still crawling with those machines. Although they're bigger. MUCH bigger.
Searching for supplies, they meet the rugged, quirky survivor named, simply, Five. She leads them to a makeshift survivor base, led by Ahmet, who has been sent a divine calling to defend civilization.
They spend a long time in this base, working on one of the scavenging teams. They get to know Five very well, and learn that her past is a total mystery. She woke up on a park bench, with nothing but her clothes, when all this starts up. She got her name from a tattoo on her shoulder, and she still has no idea where that came from.
She also points them to a strange tower in the distance, which wasn't there before. That's all they know about it, and everyone is making their own theories. Ahmet, however, has banned any exploration parties from going that direction.
Almost a month later, fate takes another twist. an attack from the Machines forces them to evacuate their base through an abandoned mine shaft, the group leaves the survivors and fights their way to the tower. As they arrive, and make their way to the top, they realize that the tower is the target of a military operation. Now holding their lives at stake, they attempt to hold off the hordes of Machines in time for a rescue to arrive.
P.S. It is kind of long, even though I omitted everything unimportant.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Rise of the Machine
Phoenix, Arizona
Two months ago, Christian Miller woke up in the ER of a hospital, following a violent car crash. He was badly injured, even though he could swear he only had one drink, and there had been something on the road… He was bound for jail for DUI and Destruction of Public Property unless he agreed to some serious community service.
Drafted into service work in the hospital, he notices a patient wheeled in that won't stop screaming. As he watches, the Blood Pressure continues to rise. The patient dies in one last faint scream. Then the ER gets strangely...silent.
Minutes later, a small metal tumor rises out of the patients temple. The heart rate monitor then says the patient is alive again, and everything is fine. A nurse leans over to listen for breath. Almost instantly, the patient leaps up and bites off her ear. Tearing out the straps that were placed in before he died, and chases the fleeing doctors. A lot of the other nearby patients do the same. And parts of them seem...almost metallic.
Barely escaping with their lives, Christian and several others hide out in the cellar of a restaurant called The Dinner Lobby. With him are the two others from the car accident, Jonathan and Amanda; Nancy, an ER nurse with recurring panic attacks; and Rick, a hospital security guard who doesn't know what happened to his wife.
Later on, they are forced out of their hiding place. What they find above is simply deserted. Rubble, still crawling with those machines. Although they're bigger. MUCH bigger.
Searching for supplies, they meet the rugged, quirky survivor named, simply, Five. She leads them to a makeshift survivor base, led by Ahmet, who has been sent a divine calling to defend civilization.
They spend a long time in this base, working on one of the scavenging teams. They get to know Five very well, and learn that her past is a total mystery. She woke up on a park bench, with nothing but her clothes, when all this starts up. She got her name from a tattoo on her shoulder, and she still has no idea where that came from.
She also points them to a strange tower in the distance, which wasn't there before. That's all they know about it, and everyone is making their own theories. Ahmet, however, has banned any exploration parties from going that direction.
Almost a month later, fate takes another twist. an attack from the Machines forces them to evacuate their base through an abandoned mine shaft, the group leaves the survivors and fights their way to the tower. As they arrive, and make their way to the top, they realize that the tower is the target of a military operation. Now holding their lives at stake, they attempt to hold off the hordes of Machines in time for a rescue to arrive.
